Unicorns (Intro)


«Time stamp»
Friday the 13th, early evening

«Hero, Voltaire and Deady with a Black Unicorn being put inside a volcano»

Hero: You're right. This IS the only way to get her attention. Something as massive as that giant Mechanical Girl, well…
Hero: I agree. With the chalice, the volcano, the -

«Andrew jumps up into the scene»


«Deady hits Andrew in the head, knocking him out»

Voltaire: Some pretty pink prancing unicorn isn't going to grab HER attention! Would YOU notice them if you could fire rocks whenever you wanted?

«Hero gets the choice between: Good: …Nope. But then, I would never ravage a town already destroyed by dragons. Evil: …Nope. Not unless I was going to make a bucketload of gold for it! However both choices lead to the same direct outcome»
«Change scene to Fire Town being destroyed by a robotic gigant»

Hero: And to think, I never would have found the town if I hadn't followedthat li'l baby unicorn down a lava-covered path and ran into this guy.

«Change scene back to the volcano»

Andrew: You never know WHAT will happen when you work with unicorns.
Andrew: People don't respect them enough, thinking they're all just fluffy, pink, fuzzy-headed creatures!

Voltaire: They aren't?

Hero: Now we can challenge ourselves - test our battle prowess - by saving a town from a giant, robot queen. THAT will be a story for the campfires!

Deady: Pffft. You wouldn't be able to do it without US. You're lucky we're here.

«Time Stamp»
Friday the 13th, early morning

«Hero in a tunnel, looking at a mirror»

Hero: Alright, self. A giant robot woman is destroying this town AFTER it's already been hit by the crazed fire dragons.
Hero: And to make matters WORSE, it's Friday the 13th. I guess that means it's time for… VOLTAIRE!

«Jason comes into scene»

No one ever uses me for this holiday anymore! *sadface*

«Jason goes out of the scene»

Hero: Since Voltaire probably doesn't know he needs to be here, I guess I'll have to summon him. This will probably work… maybe.
Hero: Bloody Deady!
Hero Bloody Deady!

«Voltaire's face appears for a while in the mirror before disappearing»

Hero: Bloody Deady!

«Voltaire and Deady teleports into the tunnel»

Hero: Awwwwright! I knew there had to be some truth to that urban legend! Thanks for coming, Voltaire!

Voltaire: Anytime, for you. What good's my axe on Friday the 13th if it's not wielded in Lore's defense?
Voltaire: So. What are we up against this time? Traveling to skull-strewn islands? Battling evil aliens?

Hero: Not a chance! we're facing a town under siege from a little robot girl.

Voltaire: … A little robot girl?

Hero: Yup!

Voltaire: I'm leaving.

«Voltaire runs away»

Hero: She got bigger!
Hero: … and has missiles!

«Voltaire comes back»

Voltaire: Missiles? … ok, I'm in.

Hero: Alright! Now I just need to go into town and get some more info on this monster. You stay here and strategize.

Voltaire: Can you pick up my dry cleaning while you are down there?

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