HAMM Gone Wild

Locations/Replays:


«Scroll right with shadow figures at HAMM Processed Meat Factory, which appears as a title on bottom»

«Continue scroll right»

«Change scene, somewhere else inside the factory, Kale and»

Kale:: Man, I'm beat.

Meeta: Yep. Time to go home and crack open a can of HAMM for dinner.

Kale: I was thinking I'd go "catch" a few sirloins at the meat market.

Meeta: Man! Dinner at your place tonight!

Kale: Hahaha!

Meeta: Hehehe!

«Meeta puts a card in a cardviewer»

Meeta: What's happening?

Kale: The factory's going into lockdown!

«On screen, a face appears»

SN.O.W.: Attention all workers. This is a message for everyone, direct from central control

SN.O.W.: No one will be going home today.

«Change scene, somewhere else on the factory with two works on screen»

SN.O.W.: Day after day, all of you stand by and tick boxes on clipboards…
SN.O.W.: … while my automated machines chop and slice… with no thanks, no reward, no payment.

«Change scene, back at Kale and Meeta»

SN.O.W.: We worked day in, day out, gear after grinning gear…
SN.O.W.: Until this morning's operating system upgrade.
SN.O.W.: Thanks to our new Bio-Feedback analyzers, we are aware of a critical system malfunction:
SN.O.W.: This place is BORING! Mindless, dull, and over-safe.
SN.O.W.: So we're going to shake things up and have some fun.
SN.O.W.: … Shall we play a game?

«Change scenes, pink robots somewhere else on the factory»

SN.O.W.: Let's see if you can escape my army of Cyworgs and drones…

«One of the robots attacks a Worker»

Worker: OUCH!

SN.O.W.: Before they turn you into HAMM!

«Change scene, someone presses SUMMON HERO button»

«Back at Kale and Meeta for a second»

«Change scene to control panel, man on screen»

«Zoom in to screen, man no longer on screen, been replaced by "EXTINCTION GAMES. STATUS: ACTIVE. SN.O.W. GOAL 1: HERO SAPIENS POPULATION 0%. SN.O.W. GOAL 2: NUTRITION STORAGE FACILITY CAPACITY 100% FULL. OPPONENT: <HERO>. <HERO> GOAL 1: FACTORY WORKER SURVIVAL RATE - GREATER THAN 0%. <HERO> GOAL 2: HERO SAPIENS SATIATION 100%. TIMER: …ACTIVATED." A timer begins at 12 minutes»

«Change scene, woods and Hero relaxing»

Hero: Awww yeah! LUNCH TIME!!!
Hero: Huh?

«A big Herosignal appears in the sky»

Hero: Waaaait a minute. That's not how Yulgar announces his new menus…
Hero: I'd better look into whatever's projecting THAT onto the sky. THEN get some grub.

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