Locations/Replays:
«LightGuard Castle»
Arryd: Good job collecting all of those undead parts for the disguise!
Arryd: Oh no…
Hero: …?
Arryd: How much damage are you doing!? Most of these undead bits are in terrible shape.
Hero: I can always get more.
Hero: It's not like there's a shortage of undead stuff out there.
Arryd: Nah. Don't worry. Sir Coat will use them to make your disguise. He can work miracles.
Arryd: You should see his costumes for the stageshow "LightGuard Keep presents… Paladin Follies!"
Arryd: Haha, we make all the new recruits do it.
Hero: …
Arryd: Don't look at me like that. It's fun.
Arryd: Anyway, Sir Coat has made ALL the costumes for the past five years. Isn't that right?!
Sir Coat: People, please… I am TRYING to CREATE!
Hero: So once this is done, what is the plan? Sneak attack?
Arryd: Not exactly.
Arryd: Since we can't go through these undead, we're going around them.
Arryd: We need you to sneak through the undead horde and place this Stone of Teleportaion behind them.
Arryd: When you return we will activate our teleporter ring. We'll have a clear path to flank them from the front and the rear.
Sir Coat: Your disguise is ready.
«You have obtained [Skeleton Costume]!»
Hero: That is my "disguise'?!
Hero: What happened to that giant pile of bones I just gathered for you?!
Sir Coat: Threw them out. They weren't white enough.
Hero: They weren't WHITE ENOUGH?! White enough for WHO?!
Hero: Plus, bones aren't naturally white anyway, they're an off-white that…
Sir Coat: Well, I like MY skeleton bones snow white* and I'm the costume designer. Live with it.
Arryd: It'll do. You've probably noticed that things without brains aren't too bright.
Hero: …
Hero: … you REALLY think they are going to fall for… THIS?
Arryd and Sir Coat: …
«Hero puts on the costume»
Hero: OK. Gimme the rock.
Arryd: Good luck, hero.
Arryd: Oh, and while you're out there… see what you can find out about whatever is leading these undead.
Hero: Be right back.
«Fade to black and returns you to DoomUndead»
Locations/Replays:
«Close-up of Hero with the teleportation rune»
Hero: WOOOHOOOO!!!! Easiest quest ever!
Hero: Now, all I need to do is place this teleportation rune on the ground.
Hero: Hmmm…. You know, normally there is some sort of twist to these easy missions.
Hero: A twist like… hmm… I dunno… some sort of super dangerous confrontation with the ultimate evil or something like that.
Hero: Wait a second! There is ALWAYS a twist… and it always happens immediately after I complete the quest.
Hero: OH NO! NOT THIS TIME!
Hero: NOPE! I'm definitely not falling for it this time!
Hero: The second I place this Rune on the ground, some crazy plot-changing thing is going to happen.
Hero: So I'm not going to do it! Heh!
Hero: HAH! Take that!
Hero: No twist will be happening here! Now THAT is a twist!
Hero: In fact, I am just going to throw this rune away instead.
«Hero throws the teleportation rune away»
Hero: I am a genius. This is the smartest thing I have ever…
«Shows a Paladin facing Vordred»
Hero: …you have to be kidding me.
Paladin: So you are the leader of this undead army!?
Paladin: By the light, I shall send you back to the darkness that spawned you, DoomKnight!
Vordred: DOOMKNIGHT? HAH. HAH. HAH.
Vordred: FOOLISH PALADIN. EYES HAVE NOT BEEN LAID UPON MY KIND BEFORE.
Paladin: …but my eyes will see your undead form disintegrated by the power of light!
Paladin: ILLUMINATED HAWKLANCE OF TRUTH!
«Paladin attacks»
Paladin: May the fates have mercy on thy…
«Vordred blocks the attack»
Paladin: WHAT??!!
Hero: …Impossible.
Vordred: HAH. HAH. HAH.
Paladin: It did not even… scratch you.
Vordred: HAH. HAH. YOUR LIGHT-BASED SPELLS CANNOT HARM ME, PALADIN.
Paladin: I can sense that you are undead. How can an undead creature be immune to the light?
Vordred: MY MASTER TIRES OF THE PALADINS' INTERFERENCE HERE…
Paladin: Hunting Paladins!? … Who… what are you?
Vordred: I AM VORDRED, THE PALADIN SLAYER.
Paladin: I will fight you with my dying breath, monster!
Vordred: HAH1HAH1 NO. YOU, LIKE YOUR FRIENDS, WILL SERVE ME WITH IT.
Vordred: VOIDUMINANCE NECROT-MORPH!
«Paladin turns into an undead»
Vordred: MY 776th PALADING TROPHY. ONLY ONE LEFT TO CLAIM…
Vordred: …ARTIX!
Hero: You know…
Hero: …on second thought maybe I should have just put the rune back over there.
Hero: This rune is nothing but trouble.
«Hero drops the teleportation rune.»
Vordred: …
Hero: Uh… no one over here except us, um… us skeletons!
Vordred: UNDEAD MINIONS… BRING ME THE INTRUDER!
«Hero is brought to Vordred»
Hero: So how did you see through my awesome disguise?
Vordred: I HAVE THE ABILITY: DETECT LIVING
Hero: Oh… that sounds. Um. Handy.
Vordred: IT IS.
Hero: Anyways… just wanted to let you know, I am "the Hero."
Vordred: YOU?
Hero: Yup. I am the main hero. So, I can pretty much guarantee that I will escape this.
Hero: Artix is my friend and I'll never let you touch so much as a single hair on his head!
Hero: Face it… you're going down, bonehead.
Vordred: HAH! HAH! HAH! HOW AMUSING.
Vordred: …AND WHAT EXACTLY WILL YOU DO WHEN YOU ESCAPE, HERO?
Hero: I'd head back to **Lightguard Keep* and turn this quest in for tons of XP.
Vordred: I ACTUALLY LIKE THIS PLAN… HERO.
Hero: what? … really?
Vordred: YES. HEAD BACK TO LIGHTGUARD KEEP. GET LOTS OF XP.
Hero: So you're going to untie me?
Vordred: YES.
Vordred: …ONCE I HAVE MADE YOU MY UNDEAD SLAVE.
Vordred: VOIDUMINANCE NECROT-MORPH!
«Turns you into an Undead and fades to black»
Hero: If anyone EVIL is going to take Artix down, it's ME!
Hero: Face it… you're going down, bonehead.
Vordred: HAH! HAH! HAH! HOW AMUSING.
Vordred: … AND WHAT EXACTLY WILL YOU DO WHEN YOU ESCAPE, HERO?
Hero: I'd head back to **Lightguard Keep* and turn this quest in for tons of XP.
Vordred: I ACTUALLY LIKE THIS PLAN… HERO.
Hero: what? … really?
Vordred: YES. HEAD BACK TO LIGHTGUARD KEEP. GET LOTS OF XP.
Hero: So you're going to untie me?
Vordred: YES.
Vordred: …ONCE I HAVE MADE YOU MY UNDEAD SLAVE.
Vordred: VOIDUMINANCE NECROT-MORPH!
«Turns you into an Undead and fades to black»
Locations/Replays:
«LightGuard Keep»
Arryd: The Hero has returned!
Arryd: I can't believe you pulled it off!
Sir Coat: Yeeeeeah!!
Arryd: Wow… that disguise is even better than I remember.
Sir Coat: Yeah! I really outdid myself. You look like a real undead skeleton!
Hero: Arrreeeewwwww…
Arryd: So were you able to place that teleportation rune?
Hero: Arrreeeewwwww…
Arryd: Haha. You are so funny. You can stop acting now.
Hero: Arrreeeewwwww…
Arryd: Wow. You really take your role seriously Hero!
Sir Coat: Um… Arryd.
Hero: ARRRRRReeeewwwww…
Arryd: So did you get a good look at the leader of this undead army?
Hero: ARRRRREEEEEWWWWW…
Sir Coat: … Arryd!
Arryd: Hang on, we are talking here!
Sir Coat: ARRYD!
Arryd: What?
Sir Coat: The Hero is actually undead!
Arryd: Impossible. Here… look I will take off the paper bag.
«Black Screen»
Arryd: WHAT THE— OMG!!
Sir Coat: OMG!!
Arryd: The Hero has been turned undead!
Guard: The hero is leading the undead into the keep!
Hero: ARRRRREEEEEWWWWW…
Arryd: The Hero is too strong… our attacks are useless!
Arryd: Flee!
Guard: Help!!
Guard: /join Anyotherzonebutthisone!!
Arryd: Oh no… this is it. LightGuard Keep is about to be overrun!!
???: Mind if I lend a hand?
Arryd: Please! Help!
Guard: We're saved!
Guard: It's…
«Who do you think it is?»
«Are you sure…?»
«Are you REALLY sure?»
«Ok… GOOD LUCK!»
Arryd: It's…
Guard: It's…
Guard: It's…!!!
«LightGuard Keep»
Arryd: Vayle, The Necromantress!?
Sir Coat: Vayle, The Necromantress!?
Vayle: So, THIS skeletal minion is actually the Hero?
«Arryd and Sir Coat nod»
Hero: Arrreeeewwwww…
Vayle: Indeed. So… this is the power of the Paladin Slayer?
Vayle: His darkness magic is far too powerful. I'm afraid that it is irreversible.
Hero: Really?
Vayle: YOU ARE UNDEAD! THE UNDEAD ARE NOT ABLE TO TALK!
Hero: Whoops! *cough* I mean… Arreeeww!
Arryd: Vayle, surely there must be something you can do. We can't have the world's hero as a mindless undead Skeleton!
Vayle: *sigh*
Vayle: There is… ONE thing we can do.
Vayle: This is my Spirit Shard. It doesn't have much power left.
Vayle: *furrows brow* Not since Artix cracked it with his dragon lance 5 years ago.
Hero: !!
Vayle: If this… hero… really is the chosen one… then…
Vayle: Then… I will use the last of the Spirit Shard's power to return you.
Hero: !!!
Vayle: But on ONE CONDITION!
Hero: Aaarrrrreeeeewww?
Vayle: You keep Artix away from that Paladin Slayer at ALL costs. *I* I am going to be the one who slays Artix.
Hero: Arrreewwww.
Arryd: Was that a "yes arreewww" or a "no arreewww?"
Vayle: Hmmph! I WILL TAKE THAT AS A YES!
«Battleon»
Artix: There is an undead army attacking DoomWood!? Why would eveyone keep this a secret from me?
Artix: By the time I get there… there might not be any left!!!!
Artix: I am not sure why the hero kept this from me… but when I get there we battle ALL of the undead together! I hope there is a super tough one!
…and so Artix set out for DoomWood…
«Continue puts you in Lightguard Keep»